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Sep 24
In 1990, when Vanilla Ice raped this famous line I am sure that divorce or separation were not in his thought process however when thinking about divorce, this line actually is pretty powerful.
It is all too easy to get caught up in the stress and emotion of the process of separation or divorce and couples can easily forget to stop, take a breath and actually consider what is happening around them and what is best for the family as a whole.
Collaborative law arrived in the England some twenty years ago and many family lawyers embraced the concept as an alternative process, which had all the hallmarks of providing more positive outcomes for separating couples.
The collaborative process now is more relevant than ever with the difficulties that are presented by court delays, additional costs and also since 29 April 2024 when the Family Procedure Rules introduced the encouragement of the use of non-court dispute resolution.
Collaborative law encourages couples to speak openly and gives the forum for them to listen to each other with the benefit of round the table advice. A collaborative meeting can often be the first time in many months or even years when a separating couple truly listen to each other.
The collaborative process allows a couple to choose to have no court proceedings for the duration of the collaborative process. Upon that positive foundation, this enables a couple to consider how the needs of their family can be met fairly. It also allows a couple to come up with bespoke solutions that a court will approve but would never have imposed on their own initiative.
Under the collaborative process, the couple each appoints their own collaboratively trained lawyer who meet together, with a couple, to work things out face to face.
A couple will also have the opportunity to work with an independent financial adviser, a family consultant, a child specialist or an accountant, who will provide specialist help.
All parties sign an agreement that commits to trying to resolve the issues without going to court
The key benefits of collaborative law include:
Although the rest of the Vanilla Ice song goes down a very different path, keeping “Stop, Collaborate and Listen” in mind when contemplating divorce or separation is a good starting point.
Joanna Lofthouse is a family law specialist at Raworths Solicitors based in Harrogate, North Yorkshire.
Published on 23 September 2024